stand yourself

if that apology from you meant anything, i'd accept it now with grace. well you and i both know it's just a ploy for you to save some face. if you had any self respect you'd turn yourself in for your crime. every time you go to sleep at night, every time you tell yourself it's alright, it just becomes a bigger lie. i hope that you can stand yourself tonight.

in between days full of hypertension, basking in the memories you hold so dear, remember the vibrant defining moments. the king making maneuvers and the grand ideas. i'm glad to see the world through a different window, where glory doesn't color every move i make. no lies, no fiction, no rose pink lens. just a truthful look at the love i gave to you.

evergreen saints pray for nature's sinners. preserving every petal that was so hard won. fold into her chest a mother's crutch. relishing the lure of a distant sun. now i'm glad to see the world through the winter palette. where color wheels stall between the green and blue. no white, no snow melt, no icebound lakes, just a bird song strung across the cobalt blue, boy.

golden rule that applies to you, a zero sum puzzle of our love. even just to say the name was bitter on the tongue. the boy sailed off to riches and the girl sailed off with none. another in a broken line of loves that she had known, another silver tongue, but mercury-hearted bag of no good bones.

nothing can be said. pacify the war raging in your head. nothing to recommend. never gonna see it from the other end. you can change it all around, but the secret's so profound. nobody will be saved. you intend to take it with you to your grave. nobody will return from underneath the bridges you already burned.

you can change it all around. find a secret so profound. change it all around. this is only the beginning for you. take some time to think it over, run it through. this could only end in trouble for you. take some time to think it over.

here they come, one by one. dominoes tumble forward. but why would i believe you when lying is all you ever do? there they go soft and low, singing ebb and flow underwater. but why, whenever i call you, is crying all you do? i'm awake in the flying dream. higher than i've ever been. and i'm way past spinning in the heart of a hurricane, getting spat out again.

i'm awake, hearing what you said falling in around my head. i still get pleasure, and relieve your pain. sweep you up and carry you away, but why would i believe in you when lying is all you ever do? i'm awake in the flying dream, higher than i've ever been. but i'm way past spinning in the heart of a hurricane and getting spat out again.

who's gonna follow you into the night? who's gonna dilute the poison in your mind? who's gonna drown in your hazel eyes? who's gonna bridge every river you cross? who's gonna carry the weight of your loss? who's gonna color your blue sky? did you ever feel like a call in the night, a good idea laid to waste and left untried? now the pillar of dust that is holding you up, it's crashing down around you now and poisoning your mind.

sunsets over the beaches from now on. each day looking for new ways to go. maybe i should drop by. maybe i should have called. maybe i should have followed you and beat down your door. maybe it's gonna be breaking you every time you fall. but to shower you with pity will do you no good at all.

slow burn watching the world turn from my arms. new way of measuring each day till it's gone. sunrise building a reprise in my heart. regret tight around my chest plays its part until it's gone.