peripheral twitch

phantom touches
an impression born
of not being
wound words
so tight for so
long it will be
an endless un-
winding & i tap
tap tap tap taptaptap
out in quick tugs
the tendrils as i
loosen them
from themselves
it isn't meant
to mean anything
besides itself
it's less a poem
less a stream of consciousness
less an inner monologue
that it is just
breaths across keys
in the absence of
sleep or someone
or both
i've heard it
both ways
i've watched
the slow evening
spider march of
tangible things
spindle
thoughts out
and around
themselves
a spinneret
etiquette
of silk sidebar
significant
in-
significants
a round thing
jingling its way
in and out of rooms
summer smother
summers
mother
my inner ear
out of tune and
monkeybarring
its way through
the songs i want
to make mean more
than perhaps they should
those dreams you assign
meaning to, in lieu
of meaningful
mundanities
of this everyday thing
some people
have the gall
to call
life

mixtape xxiv - the peck & clamour

if the sun was never to rise
and the moon reflected time
it'd be a long dark night
aim your glow
guide the ships home
aim your glow
hope someone's watching
-
couldn't find you
honesty
all the blisters
you were holding alone
couldn't find you
were you water
were you breaking
my frozen bones
my broken mind
now i've spoken
what it meant to be
in your doorway
standing taller
than those long shadows
-
you hold out
for more than
you go for
it's not going
to work out
you know it
-
i've always said it's easy that way
easy to manipulate
and take me to war
squirrel it away
when you wake up cold and alive you go
butt out
thought i had it down now
this is what i asked for
-
i'm a lump of meat
with a heartbeat
electricity restarts me
and i promised myself
i wouldn't sing about death
-
fingers ring la la leaders
queue jumpers
rock fist paper scissors
it's all in your eyes
deep greedy and
googling every corner
-
how optimism led me astray
two hundred things i took the wrong way
could be blown way out, way out
it's all going to change
-
turn your passion into patience
there is bound to be great pain
and i must walk these roads to freedom
'cos i can hear them call my name
-
i still owe money
to the money
to the money i owe
never thought about love
when i thought about home
the floors are falling out
from everybody i know
-
soft from your lips
to the rise of your stomach
your long filthy fingers
keep jamming words down my throat
nothing to steal
we've got nothing to love
nothing to spill
because oh we're so innocent
-
dance for death
you lame in the morning fires
and be a ghost in the sky
will my bleeding ears be rung with joy
or are they just plain spent
and well destroyed
-
all i perceive
is wasted and broken
silvery streams
sacred when spoken
slam into me and into
the ditch of debris
everyone barks
and they're all still believing
to tear out your heart
would send all your secrets
to me
-
love in our life
is just too valuable
oh to feel
for even a second
without it
but life
without death
is just impossible
oh, to realize
something is ending
within us
feeling yourself
disintegrate

mixtape xxiv - the peck & clamour

aim - dot hacker

bones - dustin tebbutt

hold out - washed out

down now - french kicks

the weight - editors

fitzpleasure - alt-j

mind mischief - tame impala

freedom pt 2 - songs: ohia

bloodbuzz ohio - the national

on the edge of - low

ghost in the sky - sparklehorse

breaking through - mmoths

lesson in patience - chet faker

where you'll find me now - neutral milk hotel

feeling yourself disintegrate - the flaming lips